How To Translate a Woman's Tinder Biography

How To Translate a Woman’s Tinder Biography

With so many people on Tinder, it’s hard to decipher a prospective date’s bio. For example (and this is an actual bio):

I love travelling, good food, good wine, animals (I’m vegetarian!) good coffee, being outdoors, photography, music festivals, family and friends and my dog! Beards welcome!

Here’s our guide to translating a Tinder bio:

I love travelling: I go to Bali annually, for a 2 week-long bender.
I love good food: I follow most fashionable food trends, as seen on reality television. This week it’s Kimchi. Last week it was Miso.
I love good wine: I’ve never consumed good wine
I love animals: I prefer them sedated
I love good coffee: it’s spelt Expresso right?
I’m vegetarian: I eat chicken breast, it’s white and low fat. And fish, I also eat fish.
I love being outdoors: I work in an office and see 30 minutes of sunlight a day.
I love photography: Selfies
I love music festivals: I occasionally use recreational drugs
I love my family and friends: except for my married, younger, slimmer sister
I love my dog: I still love my ex-boyfriend.
Beards welcome: I’ll take anything.
Next up… How to Translate a Man’s Tinder Biography!