What Drink Should You Buy a Girl You Intend to be Intimate With?

What Drink Should You Buy a Girl You Intend to be Intimate With?

For many of you Bears heading out on the town tonight, you’ll no doubt be considering buying a girl a drink as a way of starting a conversation. Presumably, you’ll be in some trendy bar and you’ll spot some stunner, perhaps with her friends or perhaps alone, sitting at the bar just waiting for the right guy to buy her a classy drink. You’re thinking you’ll sidle on up to her, ask her name, buy her some exotic cocktail she’s never heard of, engage in some fantastic conversation about world affairs before she says words to the effect of ‘you know, I never do this, but would you like to come back to my place and finish the night there?’. So you’ll head back to her penthouse apartment on Central Park, move her surgical equipment off the bed (she has it there just in case she gets called to Africa to save some more lives at a moment’s notice) and make passionate love with the woman of your dreams. ‘Why hasn’t anyone else done this?’ you think.  ‘Get it right…and she’s mine.’

So what should you buy in this scenario? Perhaps you’re thinking:

  • a cosmo if she’s a classy city girl
  • a margarita if she’s new to the game
  • a pear martini if her personality is vibrant
  • a sea breeze if she’s a free spirit
  • a cuba libre if she has some latin passion
  • mudslide if she likes a bit of trouble

If any of what I’ve said rings true for you, it is presumably why you are desperate enough to scape through this third rate dating blog looking for answers. In short, NEVER buy a girl a drink for a girl you’ve just met. It never works. It achieves nothing. It screams ‘I don’t have enough faith in my ability to introduce myself and convey my worth so I’ll just buy your time instead’.  It makes you the dating equivalent of those charity workers who hound you on city streets. Gone is any notion you actually want to talk to her because of some trait that is unique to her.  Gone is any notion you are a confident man she might actually want to meet. You think that buying a drink will get her in the sack and that her affections can therefore be bought. Effectively you are equating her with a prostitute and yourself with that kid in 3rd grade who had to pay people to attend his party. DON’T DO IT. EVER.

The only drink that will actually make a woman submissive enough to sleep with a pathetic beta male like you is rohypn[CENSORED – ARTICLE TERMINATED]

The Bear responsible for this particular blog has taken unexpected leave and will not return in the near future. Your thoughts on great cocktails are welcome.