Signs Your Pornography Addiction Is Out Of Control
It’s common for men who have been single too long (or always) to develop a rampaging porn addiction. Generally people accept that a single guy might look at a few pairs of knockers or Google image search Fappening photos of Jennifer Lawrence. There is, however, a point where the porn addiction just goes too far. Here are some signs:
- You choose porn over a night out: your single pals invite you on a night on the town to meet some women. You decline in favour of watching two buxom blondes, each sporting tramp stamps on their lower torsos, engage in exaggerated moaning and by-the-numbers sex scenes with a fat guy with an appendage the size of an elephant’s trunk on video which looks like it’s been shot on someone’s phone. Your friends get the real thing, you masturbate furiously.
- The sex slave market scene in Taken isn’t weird to you: the creepy scene where Middle eastern businessmen bid for the right to take the virginity of kidnapped women on a boat leaves your friends repulsed. It seems familiar to you because you’ve just emerged from a joint live webcam session watched by 10 other weirdos in which you have paid to ask girls to follow your commands on camera.
- You are able to identify porn by genre: your friends can identify porn by one genre – porn. You, on the other hand, appreciate the artistry in emetophilia, big beautiful women, double penetration, bukkake and German shit porn and believe all are unique and are equivalent genres to sci-fi, comedy and action.
- You talk about your porn collection in terms of how many hard drives you have: most single men might keep a directory of porn hidden on their laptop. You talk about your porn collection in terms of how many hard drives it occupies and expect to one day wield a cloud- based collection of porn that may as well be called Skynet.
- You keep a backup of semi nude photos of friends on Facebook: a girl at the office takes a selfie sunbathing topless. You immediately right click and hit ‘save as’ and then masturbate furiously over it six months later when your broadband is knocked out, after your helper droid locates it in your library of porn hard drives.
- You ‘have to see everything’: you rationalise the bizarre stuff that has started turning you on by saying that you are a purist and feel duty bound to watch every type of porn, even if it disgusts you. This is a precursor to becoming a registered sex offender who wears an electrified ankle bracelet and makes bead necklaces with friends in a small pedophile community in country Victoria.
- You look for porn on the dark web: FFS…
Life is there to be enjoyed and your porn addiction may be getting in the way. We at the Bear don’t judge your sexual stimuli but don’t let it get in the way of real human interaction.