Pussy-shaming

Pussy-shaming

Slut shaming is a terrible way to degrade someone and the very fact that it still exists in our society reflects the reality that people are still very uncomfortable about affording women the equality they deserve. Everyone seems to agree with issues of women’s rights and the need to shake off our white puritanical heritage, yet slut-shaming is still rampant among groups of women across all cultures.

It’s mean. It’s bitchy and it can cause colossal psychological damage to the victim.

Men, on the other hand, use the same kind of shaming, but in the complete opposite way. It’s called pussy-shaming.

Firstly, lets look at the definition of a pussy in the context of dating. To most men, a pussy is a weak guy who sucks with women, or is scared to approach or sleep with women.

Pussy-shaming refers to men who berate and degrade their friends and acquaintances from not sleeping with a woman when the opportunity for sex is presented to them.

Let’s delve a little further into this. I’m going to present you with a depressing fact about single men. Most single men, out of a combination of loneliness, low self-esteem, poor self-image, generalised anxiety disorder, paralysing fear of the future, desperation and Mummy issues will sleep with any woman who shows the slightest interest in them. This is otherwise known as the ‘any hole’s a goal’ approach and it works by temporarily raising the man’s self-esteem. On the train home the next day, after sleeping with a 47 year-old mother of nine, a young man’s consciousness will become saturated with feelings of masculinity, pride and wellbeing because he experienced success with a woman. It doesn’t matter that he didn’t find her attractive. In fact, it’s totally irrelevant. To these men, physical attractiveness in a partner is a bonus, not a pre-requisite. Nothing matters to these men, aside from penile-vaginal intercourse with a woman.

Men with the ‘any hole’s a goal’ mindset are also likely to make misogynistic comments about women such as:
‘She’s fat, but I’d f*** her’

‘She’s a 4. She’s disgusting. I’d still give it to her’

‘She’s a whale, but I’d harpoon her.’

‘She’s average at best, but I’d f*** her.’

‘She’s just a cum-dumpster, nothing more. I’d f*** her.’

These comments may shock and surprise you. You might even say to yourself, ‘that can’t be true, no one is that much of an arsehole.’ But unfortunately, the above comments are on the ‘kinder’ end of the misogyny spectrum. The sad truth is, the conversational threads that bubble away among groups of single men in the corners of dancefloors or on the balconies at nightclubs are far, far worse.

Remember, men who possess the ‘any hole’s a goal’ mindset are not sophisticated men. This mindset is a sign of a low-status or an unattractive male.

The great irony is that these men have the audacity and lack of self-awareness to call their buddy a ‘pussy’ when he decides not to sleep with a woman without acknowledging the fact that, for his own reasons, his friend chose not to take up the opportunity for ‘free sex,’ and as such, is showing his desperate, unattractive friends that he isn’t desperate or unattractive like them.

I find it difficult to imagine Leonardo DiCaprio sleeping with the first woman who offers herself to him.

…Okay, bad example. Let’s use George Clooney then. He’s pretty much the classiest man in the world. Would Clooney sleep with a woman he’s not really attracted to just to make himself feel more attractive or manly?

No. He wouldn’t.

You see, men with high self-esteem, self-respect or good looks don’t feel the need to validate themselves by sleeping with every woman who shows interest in them.

But to pussy-shamers, this behaviour is unacceptable.

To our self-respecting male readers (though I’m not quite sure that we have any), don’t let your buddies call you a pussy for passing on opportunities with women. These are the guys who end up in miserable marriages because they ‘locked down’ the first girl who smiled at them. These are also the guys who brag about how they have slept with a thousand women, but then cry themselves to sleep in the arms of their grandmother after a girl doesn’t reply to their text.

These are the weak men.

These are the pussies.